THANK GOD MY MAMA DIDN'T DO THIS......

I am the oldest child. The one in the middle is my sister, Tracey. (shhh... we can talk about her later) the one on the right is my mama. She's a character.

Smart. She sure is.

Funny. Got that covered.

Inspirational. That too.

Strong --- uh-huh. My daddy was killed in an accident when I was 15. she suddenly found herself on one income with two teenage girls.

I look sooooo much like her. At times I go by my reflection and I literally see her. Those moments are very eerie.

And --- Girls I am so sorry --- but at times my mouth opens and my mama comes out. Ok ladies --- you know you said it ---- "I will NEVER say that to my kids". Then you do and then you remember. And most of the time --- then you smile.

But the one thing about my MAMA I am celebrating today.

SHE DIDN'T KILL ME WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER.

and there were times that was a distinct possibility.



oooh --- I knew EVERYTHING. And, "Bless her Heart", in my world she had to be the dumbest, meanest, most difficult person there was.

Bear with me ---- she is none of those things.

I had a smart mouth, kinda still do. That was punished.

Forge my mama's name on a paper --- NO WAY --- got my butt whipped for that in the third grade. She made a believer outta me.

14 --- wanted to date a 23 year old. Mama --- lets just let that one go for now. I married him, we have two beautiful girls, and they are the very essence of my heart.

Ran out of gas one time. She rescued us, got a friend of hers to open the service station, and then made sure we went by there and filled up after that.

Oh I thought I was slick  but --- I cannot count the number of times I wanted to do something and she said NO. Every single time I went against her will, I got caught. EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Got home one night and she asked "just what happened between you and The Man at the Dairy Queen?" damn small town America --- and this was BEFORE cell phones. We had a little (loud) disagreement in the parking lot. Somebody reported it to my mama. Man --- that was some speech. About behaving in public. And how mortifying that phone call was.

Tried the whole "but so&so's mama said she could" ----- she didn't fall for that either.

It snowed one time and they did not cancel school --- the last words out of my mouth were "don't worry mama, I won't wreck your car". Twenty minutes later I'm on a strangers house phone, calling my mama, to get her to get someone to pull same car out of the ditch.

Did I say I had a smart mouth? Still kinda do. Well, that is still reprimanded.

Again --- today I am celebrating the fact that

MY MAMA DIDN'T KILL ME WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER.

Thank you Mama.

And besides ---- just look at how many really great and embarrassing stories you get to tell now.

Mama -- I love you.