Monday, October 25, 2010

bouncing ....

Sorry - didn't mean to go mia again.

I seem to be struggling with some heavy emotions right now.

The horribly blurry picture of the poca dog was taken Saturday on the way home from the vet. She rides wonderfully, but is in steady motion the entire time. She also does not mind the trip to the vet. They are so good and she just goes right in. Good thing, because she is staying with them this weekend.

Softball Princess team made the Elite 8 Level of the State Tournament. So softball is a priority right now. Every game is emotional, because this is her Senior year and we are closing in on the end of the season.

Can we also go ahead and say - OMG what am I going to do with her daddy this time next year. He is almost a nut case right now too. They have traveled so much together for softball and travel tournaments. It is great that we (he) was able to do this, but it makes it so hard to realize that she is about to move up and on into the next phase of her life.

Last week we got the first college acceptance letter for her. I am so not ready for this.

College Girl was home this weekend and we had a surprise "date night" with her. Seems the boyfriend had to work, so we graciously stepped into being her date. It was wonderful to have her undivided attention. But, then she drops the news about grad schools she is emailing and talking to advisors about. Places like CalTech and Nebraska and MIT. You know - places a long long way from home.

All of this following very closely on the heels of my "surprise" tour earlier this year.

I feel lost - adrift - like others are okay planning for the future, but being fearful of making too many plans myself.

So I bounce - much like the dog in the car - from window to window - door to door. Reacting to the latest request for my time or attention.

I text MaryAnn about some of this on Saturday - and she reminded me that our word for this month is DARE. I'll be closing the month tomorrow with how I DARED to do some things this month and how I've been affected.

Til Tomorrow my friends - the crazy nutcase leaves you with this ---

I really do have a beautiful life. Love. More. Most. Mutual.

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