A long post that really says nothing.....

Ok peeps - sorry. MaggieGrace has some big big life things going on. So i have been a little scattered.

Here is a post of a bunch of random notes that add up to nothingness - but mostly to let you guys know I didn't die.

I will be 46 on Thursday ------

I am now the proud parent of two adults - the softball princess turned 18 on Saturday. We are busily doing the crap that we have to to get her into college and dorm life. Busy scrambling.

I have however finished a baby blanket - a gorgeously soft one in the creamy yellow color.

Plain old double crochet stitched with a tiny variation.

Front and back post double crochet rows add a bit of a fake cable effect.

A very simple single and double crochet edge treatment finished this one off. I finished it Saturday Morning and started one in a luscious oange sherbert and white variation.

I lost my halo - but then discovered it is easily replaced - and danged cheap too. Not sure if the stray apostrophe is valuable or not.

I am sucha display geek - simple white cotton knit with grey knit words. Very effective display in a New York window.

New York work trip included time for sight seeing (and beer drinking).

I was asked to stop taking these pictures - Anthro of course.

I am letting my hair grow out - I love it longer.

But then I wear it up all the time. Go figure.

I've spend some time babysitting for these monkeys.

And I am acting like a teenager - feather extensions and some really easy laughter add to that entire midlife act like a teen image. ( I love the extensions)

There has been a road trip with the entire crew (yup I've gained a couple of boys to hang out with these girls)

Flip flops and painted toenails - serious summer attire.

A visit to Ground Zero convince me that America heals - just like we all should.

Oh and the Princess got a new back glass - not sure what happened but it resulted in a 1am phone call to my cell.

So there you have random pictures that add up to an excuse for why I am not around. I will say that something has happened in my life that has resulted in getting my "give a damn" repaired. I am slowly slowly working on finishing some things that should have been done a long time ago.

I'll sign a "do better" card about keeping this updated.

Have a beautiful day.

let's have a fitness chat.

This post is about "not running away" "not giving up" "facing and conquering demons"

Hell, call it whatever you want to, I saw it in myself last night.

It was suspected that the "kidney cancer roadtrip" discovery was triggered by a particular boot camp drill.

See the picture below.......

This is a tire pull - the straps on the tires we use go around your waist. The suspicion from the doctor was that the excess pressure through my midsection during this drill was what aggravated the cancer tumour.

I haven't looked at those tires since that day. I had not avoided them, this drill just had not come up in the workout rotation. UNTIL LAST NIGHT.

I am stronger than I have ever been - mentally and physically - today. While the bootcamp workout is challenging every time, I have learned to fight my way through them. I have learned that you will not die from pushing yourself to the point of puking if needed to finish something. And the feeling of accomplishment when the workout is finished is worth every step and lift and sweat drop that wets even my underwear.

I kinda thought I had it going on --- UNTIL LAST NIGHT ---

We warmed up - We ran - We met at the practice field - We were told there were three stations - Station one for my group was abs. three minutes worth (DONE DEAL) -

Station two was a hill drill, jog down the hill then alternating lunges back up that hill - repeat three times (DONE DEAL and I FINISHED FIRST FOR MY GROUP) -

Station three was those tire pulls and on the walk to that station the irrational demons jumped on me. I was in tears before I got there and absolutely could not get a grip. The power of this emotional and mental demon surprised me - actually scared me with its intensity and power. So this sweaty, hard breathing, crazy lady, now in an irrational, hysterical, teary eyed frame of mind wants to literally say "screw this, I cannot do it." But the part of me who slays demons won that battle - I chose my tire, tossed that strap around my waist and pulled that damn tire three times up and down that field.

On the repeat of the circuit - there was a new spill of tears. Not hysterical irrational or full of fear. NOPE - this second round of tears washed away the ugly bloody remants of that demon slaying.

I finished the workout strong.

It was a physically demanding workout, but last night I learned that on this fitness journey, I cannot plan for what demons may rear their ugly head and start chanting "you cannot do this", but I can decide to silence them by simply powering on through the tears and fears.

I HAD MY STRONGEST WORKOUT EVER.

I do not run away. I do not give up. I do not allow fear to have power. These are choices I get to make. And amazingly enough - that lesson will serve me equally as well in all areas of my life.

Nope - I choose to move "only forward, never longing to go back".

Have a beautiful day ---

Missing in action....

Sorry - I didn't mean to do that again. Maybe shortly, posting will return to normal. Just had some huge life things happen to us lately. Not anything horrible - just Softball Princess graduating from high school - as the valedictorian - and other good good things.

So MaggieGrace goodness is a little shy right now. But that will be changing.

But I did have a few things to share with the internet peeps.

Ernestine Cochran, a very dear friend of mine, gave me this yesterday at church. She is a talented porcelain artist and I have several pieces of her work. But this one is so very special. It is in recognition of my cancer survival.


It came with prayers for my continued good health.

But here is the really cool part...........


That's my house. I love my house.

And on the other side......

That's my big barn... all covered with trumpet vine. That vine is in bloom right now.

And my breast cancer and kidney cancer ribbons.

I literally squealed when she gave it to me.

I am so blessed by really special people in my life.

Now for those who read because they be family members......

Saturday we were invited to the govenors mansion for a valedictorian recognition reception. This picture is way out of order, because this is right after we blew off the speeches and bailed on the whole program. The Princess was the instigator. But there wasn't much discussion before we all decided that was an excellent idea.

Mom Dad and Princess outside the mansion.

This needlepoint firescreen was in the first editions library. It has been cut from the canvas and handstitched to the silk. Intricate and beautiful.

Graduation Night - College Girl and Softball Princess. These two are my life.

A word about the Princess Speech at graduation. She is not your typical really serious academic student. We were not privy to any of her speech preparation - so moms mouth dropped open when her first word at the podium was "wassup". That jaw drop was soon followed by the phrase "oh my God" as she proceeded to deliver a witty and majorly different valedictorians address - to many cheers and much applause from the packed house.

Excerps from the speech can be found here. http://www.madisonjournaltoday.com/archives/4095-MCHS-graduates-say-goodbye.html

We will be spending the summer getting ready for the transition into being a college student.

College Girl will be spending her time in the Chemistry Dept at UGA on a summer internship and collecting salamander eggs for her senior bio chem research project.

Hope this finds all of you having a wonderful day.

This Girl

Graduates from High school next week.

Is going to college on an academic scholarship. Will play softball for that same college.

Was named valedictorian at the honors night services last night.

Can you guys say proud mama?

Running and counting blessings

That picture is of Hartwell Dam. I grew up playing in the lake created by this dam. Camping, skiing, boating, floating, sun bathing, all those kinds of outdoor activities.

And this coming Saturday, I will be a runner. A relatively new outdoor activity for me. One that has come with sweat, tears, challenges, and perserverance.

I've lost 58 pounds - I have not taken one diet pill. As my friend Dawn Demo says "the answer is no... NO pills, NO lipo, NO bands, NO staples. It's called will power, sweat, and goals."

I'm eating better, I work out HARD, I drink my water. And slowly the pounds are coming off.

I would like to lose 25 - 30 more.

The 5K on Saturday morning will start from the South Carolina side of Hartwell Dam, follow the pavement above, cross the Dam, and end on the Georgia side of it. I was registered for this run last year when the "SURPRISE YOU LOST A KIDNEY TO CANCER" roadtrip began. The doctors were a little funny about letting me run a week after taking my kidney in a major surgery. So I sat and watched my daughter run. And I cried.

There will be hundreds of runners all with their own reason for doing this. Me - I'm running because I want to stay healthy this time. I'm doing the work every day to be that way. Making smarter decisions with eating, exercise, rest, lifestyle. I can honestly say that doing this for myself was, and still is hard. But it is so very worth the effort.

I have a 45 minute goal for myself.

I'm a little concerned, because right now, my asthma is not very well controlled. I've been struggling with that for about three weeks (hello pollen season) But I'm excited. I am healthy. My cancer recovery is now complete.

Better than that - I survived all the challenges so far, with very little negative effects mentally and physically.

So hey - lets roll - I'll let you you know next week just how I performed.

I can't wait to look down river from the top of the dam. And to count blessings. There will be a blessing with every step.

3.2 miles of blessings - that's gonna be a really big list.

Have a wonderful weekend.

Smiles

Good Monday morning.

Right now - I find myself wondering if Bin Laden might be looking for his virgins.

Anyway - this is not a political blog. It is my world. It is my place of happiness and joy and beauty and creativity and all that stuff.

And it is time for a word challenge update. MaryAnn chose the word for April, and she chose the word SMILE. It was a good time for a really fun word. I smiled every day this month. My world is full of amazing surprises right now. Those make me smile. My baby girl is winding down her Senior school year. That makes me smile as she moves on to the next phases of her life. And we recently got the great news - Softball Princess was named the Valedictorian of her class and that really makes me smile.

And we are busy at work. For the first time in a long time, we have seen promise in the construction industry. That is reason to smile.

I have chosen the word for May - and that word is PRAISE. So go ahead play along with us and PRAISE in your own way this month. I promise this one will be fun.

Now for a couple more pictures of "the dress" we designed and made -




For Carrie - a super nice detail shot of the bodice. What cha think? Oh and check out that smile. I'm kinda partial to it, but I think she is beautiful.


I stole this one off her facebook. It really shows the beautiful way the grey underskirt shows through the lace. Love this picture.

I'll be back in a few with some MaggieGrace reality. Things have happened in my life that have given me some energy and enthusiasm for finishing some projects. There is a tiny bit of extra time as the soccer season has ended. Life is good - no actually - life is GREAT.

Hope all this finds you guys having a fabulous day.

I know I am.

College Girls Prom Dress

Okay, she is an adult. Her boy actually is as well, but he is a senior in high school and they were going to prom together. College Girl approached me and said, "I want to make my prom dress." And she had an inspiration photo. Grey and black and a sheer overlay and check out the bodice. My response OH MY GOOD GRACIOUS HAVE YOU LOST YOUR DAMN MIND. or some other adult language version of that phrase. But being the wonderful and kind and loving mother that I am. And having an enormous amount of spare time to devote to this project ----- I said sure honey. Knowing full well that her idea of making this dress was going to involve me way more than I wanted to be involved. A pattern was purchased. Fabric. Notions. And away we go. We had a pattern for a strapless under dress. But that bodice - the really important part - well she trusted her Mama to come up with something. Mind you - that picture was the inspiration. The finished dress only kinda has that idea. But it was very very pretty. AND I FINISHED THE DAMN THING AT 2:45 PM ON SATURDAY THE DAY OF AND PICTURES WERE AT 3:15PM. There ya go. Pictures from the day. College Girl and Softball Princess. The gunmetal grey was beautiful on her.

Mom's interpretation of the bodice inspiration.

The adorable couple - All pictures were made at Watson Mill Bridge State Park.

Ben's mom made his vest and bow tie from the same fabric as the dress. Nice attention to detail.

NOTE TO ALL PARTIES READING THIS - the covered buttons on the vest, Ben did those himself.

The lace is beautiful - I have some left - it will go into the stash.

I am pleased with the outcome. A dress that she will wear once. But we worked on it together and together time is limited when a girl child enters her twenties. Really the time spent together was the best part of this project.

I am really happy I jumped in and said ---- SURE, WE CAN MAKE YOUR DRESS.

Have a beautiful day.

About the shoes - again

Disclaimer - you can bail on this post - it is all about prom pictures - most likely interesting only to us family peeps. Saturday was a very important day at our house. A year ago - I was lying in a hospital bed trying not to bleed to death from a cancerous tumour. We celebrated that anniversary all day. It was also the Softball Princess Senior Prom. And yes - it was about the shoes again. Check these out. Custom order converse - to match the dress. Great aren't they. I took a similar picture last year and loved it. Love this one too.

College Girl went too - her boy is the same age as Softball Princess. More on her stuff next post.

Silly girl - I love her sense of humour and style.

See what I mean.

Me and she ---- shh.. MaryAnn please don't use a red pen here.

It was noted that Daddy matched her outfit.

He's kinda fond of her. When he told her she was beautiful in front of The Man and I, she was so horribly embarassed. I hope he tells her again and again how beautiful she is.

Handsome couple - he's smart and funny and really good to her.

I think this may be my favorite shot of the prom pictures of them. Caught them just chatting while we took College Girl Pictures.

Baby Girl, you are beautiful. Blake boy, you are handsome. Remember these days always.

It was our last prom. It was bittersweet. I am happy to be her mama. She has been joy in my heart since I found out we were expecting her. God, I love that girl.

Life is so beautiful.

Restrictions........... and some public service lists.

Notice - the picture has not a dang thing to do with the post - not exactly. And it was taken some 50 pounds ago. Yay me.

I AM NOT PREACHING - PROMISE.

But in a way it does. See we are fixing food in this picture that is "healthy". That pill bottle contains my blood pressure medication -which at this time has been cut to the lightest dose made and is almost approaching being eliminated.

As I added healthy foods and exercise to my lifestyle - I did not get rid of soft drinks. I simply changed them to the Diet Dr. Pepper variety.

I was exercising regularly for the first time in years and part of that routine was two Ibuprophen tablets before a workout and then some afterwards.

As I have been completely honest about here - I also consumed tequila (and other alcohol) regularly.

Well then, life threw me onto the sidetrip now known as the SURPRISE YOU HAVE KIDNEY CANCER vacation. I lost a kidney and gained some restrictions.

1. only three alcoholic beverages per week - I can have them all in one day or space them out over a week. (the joke is I now make margaritas in a BigGulp cup)

2. No Ibuprophen or Aleve - actually all anti inflammatory meds are to be used very very cautiously. (I can take Tylenol or Acetaminophen based pain meds)

3. No artificial sweeteners. (aspartame, sucralose, saccharin, etc)

Well - jokingly the alcohol was gonna be the biggest issue.

NOPE ------- I read labels ALL THE FOOD LABELS BEFORE I EAT OR DRINK ANYTHING.

Seems artificial sweeteners - which are horrible for your brain - nervous system - kidneys and liver - show up in some of the most unexpected places.

Newsflash - I would do almost anything for a Diet Dr. Pepper.

But in reading labels I found some really bizarre locations - aspartame is in almost every chewing gum out there - Bubble Gum being an exception. Even some ketchup contains aspartame. Yup.

Here is the generic list from the ASPARTAME.ORG website. and no they do not have to be labeled as diet or low calorie to have the product in them - you have to read all that damn timy print to find out.

Breath Mints, Carbonated Soft Drinks, Cereals, Chewing Gum, Flavored Syrups for Coffee, Flavored Water Products, Frozen Ice, Frozen Ice Cream Novelties, Fruit Spreads, Gelatin, Sugar Free, Hard Candies, Ice cream Toppings, Ice Creams, No Sugar Added or Sugar Free, Iced Tea, Powder, Iced Tea, Ready to Drink, Instant Cocoa Mix, Jams & Jellies, Juice Blends, Juice Drinks, Maple Syrups, Meal Replacements, Mousse, No Sugar Added Pies, Non-Carbonated Diet Soft drinks, Nutritional Bars, Powdered Soft Drinks, Protein Nutritional Drinks, Pudding, Soft Candy Chews, Sugar Free Chocolate Syrup, Sugar Free Cookies, Sugar Free Ketchup, Table Top Sweeteners, Vegetable Drinks, Yogurt, Drinkable, Yogurt, Fat Free, Yogurt, Sugar Free

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SACCHARINE - the original recognized alternative.

shows up in baked goods, diet drinks, ICE CREAM, and of all freaking places ----- TOOTHPASTE.

***********************************************************************

Sucralose (Splenda) - this is made from suger and CHLORINE (you know the same stuff as bleach) In my opinion that really needs no elaborating.

But it may occur in Yogurt, Syrup, Canned Fruit, and Ice Cream.

***********************************************************************

So now you see why the artificial sweeteners are my biggest challenge. I have done reasonably well at eliminating them, and still maintain my weight loss. But I haven't lost any more weight and I really do need to. So I am once again working on my diet and upping my exercise intensity.

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I do want to add that I know many people who are regular users of these products. I am not saying they are good, bad, or indifferent in their use. (although the FDA does have a daily usage amount listed in the sweetener specifications. ) I am simply saying that they are on my NO list for some reason. So for me -- plain old sugar / corn syrup / honey have become my go to sweeteners and I really believe that used in moderation can cause no weight issues in a healthy person.

I'll keep you updated as I continue my health and weight loss journey.

Much love. (and have a margarita tonight - I know I am)

Teresa

I hope there is some information here that you can use.