Thursday, September 25, 2008

Jealousy

The picture has nothing to do with this post - just a candid moment of the softball princess with her friend Cortney.

I generally talk to the local best friend every day. Thursday mornings are no different except that I know he had church on Wednesday Night and that several of them go to dinner afterwards. Both of his parents are deceased, but he and his cousins and their families make remaining close a priority. The Wednesday Night meal can be just him or it can expand to a full blown party with several joining him. I am ever so slightly jealous of this fact.

My family is not intact. Monday would have been my dad's birthday, Tuesday was the anniversary of his death. I see and talk to my mom often. Sporadically I talk to my sister. Christmas we get together with my Aunt, Uncle and cousins.

The Man at my address is fairly close to his family, but we are spread out all over the state. My inlaws are the most wonderful and sweet parents and we do not see them often enough.

Back to the jealousy part. It is not an ugly thing. I just envy how close LBF has remained to his extended family. It takes committment to keep those relationships active and I am so happy that he has that.

Growing up - every Sunday was family time with my Mom's side of the family. We went to church, then everyone cooked lunch and ate together at her house. I remember many of the dishes, but more than that I remember playing on the sidewalk and steps in the front yard. The snowball bush in the side yard. The fig tree in corner of the porch. The laughter and all of the conversations. There are many many photos of those days. I also remember the very first time I felt like a "big girl" because I was allowed to walk to Nanny's house by myself from the church ( a distance of about a mile) . We were able to do this every Sunday because we all lived close by.

We don't do that kind of thing now and I miss it. I miss the feeling of being part of something bigger than just what happens at my house. That is the level of the jealousy that I feel.

Now that the College Freshman is out and about in her new life, I feel a need to pull that kind of thing into our lifestyle. I did find out that She and the Softball Princess text or facebook all the time. That makes me feel better, the two of them are incredibly close and I am oh so happy about that.

How do all of you keep close to your families even if many miles separate you? Any ideas about evolving traditions as your children move into new roles as adults? Am I the only one who longs for that feeling of the bigger family picture?

Sorry this is rather rambly and whiney - maybe I am just missing my Dad.

I hope everyone has a wonderful day.







2 comments:

ellen said...

I still miss my parents and I lost them way too early in my life. My painful experiences now are with my sister. We live only about 2 hours apart, in the same state, and I have not seen her since Christmas. The relationship that we once had is not here any more. It is never "convenient" for me to visit and she does not want to come to see me. I was going to see her this last Tuesday and spend part of the day with her. The phone call did come Mon. evening. She had too much to do, were my feelings hurt? Did I understand? Yes, I understood, but not in the way she intended. I feel as if I have lost her and it hurts.
I am glad that your girls are keeping in touch. It warms my heart that my two boys are close and love each others company. I hope that never changes! Family connections are important. Take care.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I remember close family times in years past..PRECIOUS MEMORIES!! Here we are now and we miss family times because everyone is miles away, busy working, school, church, sports, & other. It is so different and we all miss so much. We think of loved ones & pray.H&A.